Booty Got Back
Has your booty been feeling a little on the chunky side of late? Like it’s taking on its own personality. It’s starting to think for itself. Have its own social life. Like it’s actually sitting next you on the couch, not under you. It won’t budge. Stubborn and proclaiming it’s right to vote.
Well maybe I’m going too far. But you get my drift.
There was nothing stopping me from getting my butt into gear and getting fit.
I had time after work. I had a gym membership. I had the new sneakers and gym clothes.
Nothing. Stopping. Me.
But there was something stopping me. Because every time I tried to exercise there was that niggling voice in my head that talked me out of it. Maybe it was my butt talking. Telling me such things as ‘I don’t want to catch a cold and it’s going to rain, so I better go straight home after work’. There. Was. One. Cloud. Week after week I was wasting money on my gym membership whilst my butt grew and grew.
Lack of Motivation Was a Brick Wall
Then I finally realized. I had a serious lack of motivation. I had to conquer it. Somehow.
I found a friend to go to the gym with me. That really helped. We encouraged each other to go. But that was just one night of the week. The other nights it was just me and my butt. And my butt won out every time.
How to Get Fit and Maintain Dignity
The idea of a personal trainer didn’t appeal to me. I imagined a super fit and tanned, super human shouting down at me to do more push ups, whilst I crumbled at their feet, sweating from my knees with my butt crack exposed for the world to see. No, paying someone to do that sounded like a kind of torture that was not for me.
I’ll Try Anything
So then one day a friend recommended I try a fitness tracker. A fitness tracker is like a pimped out version of a pedometer. It tracks daily exercise and even sleep. You use an app to set daily targets and goals. After a week or so I bit the bullet and bought a Fitbit thing (I can be a tight ass as well as having a big ass). I attached the little device to my clothing every day. I started off with smaller goals of 5000 steps and then slowly increased to 10,000 steps.
Finally I found motivation. I found myself taking the long way to the shops. I took the stairs at work and at the mall instead of the elevator or escalator. I actually went to the gym. I told my husband and he joined in. It became a nightly thing where we would compare steps.
So it’s still early days, but I’m feeling so much better now I’m getting Planet Butt back into shape, one step at a time.